Pray

Recently troubled by a lot of stuffs...

Feel relieved after i spit them all out...

In a very agitate way...

I always do...

Keep complaining everything that i hate to the people...

After the long complain...

When i calmed myself down in my little room with no one here...

I suffered from self-guiltiness...

I prayed to God after my quiet time...

I wept as i prayed...

Poured every feelings and everything that i am not satisfy with to Him...

I displayed my sins to Him...

I can only cry uncontrollably in front of Him...

Although i cried in front of 3 women these 3 days...

But i tried to control my tears in front of them and i could always control my tears very well...

Due to my sensibility...

I think i should not cry until i cannot talk in front of people...

It will let them feel uneasy...

Isn't it?

I always hide my feelings from the strangers...

And keep complaining everything to the people i think i can trust...

But after that i suffered from a very bad feelings...

I should not talk about others' bad words,isn't it?

A Voice keep reminding me like this...

The Voice in me reminded me with God's words...

I know i am suffering...

But i should behave like a God's child and handle everything in the ways He pleased...

He is taking control in everything...

What for you still worrying about everything?

He is justice...

Why feel unfair towards everything?

You did all this is because you love Him!

He sacrificed Himself for you on the cross...

Why can't you sacrifice a little bit on you for Him?

He is the source of comfort...

Just come in front of Him...

Place all worries,suffers and grieves onto His mighty hands...

I always control my life...

Planned everything and tried to let everything follow my plans...

But i always failed to do so...

I feel discouraged...

I hate accidents during my plans...

But this reminds me of He is the one who taking control...

He is the one planning everything...

What for you want to snatch His works and make yourself so busy and suffer?

Shouldn't you just follow His plan and you will not make any mistakes in His perfect plans?

I pray for an obedient heart in me...

I pray for a loving heart in me...

I pray for I can surrender everything to You...

I pray for peace in me...

I pray for strength from You to help me overcome all kinds of obstacles...

I pray for Your Wills...

Lord, mould me to be a child who please You...

Lord, i hand my pen to You...

You know what i need and which are suitable for me...

Lord, i willing to follow your Wills...

In Jesus's most precious name i pray,

Amen.